Couples and Individual Counselling
Couples Counselling
Couples counselling is my particular interest and passion.
This interest led me to seek specific training and supervised experience in couples counselling, more specifically in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). EFT is a model of couples counselling, based on attachment theory, that is designed to help couples access and deal with the underlying emotions that lead us into a continuous downward cycle of conflict in our relationships. The emphasis in EFT is not on merely teaching skills and does not get caught in the impossible task of assessing who is more to blame. As an alternative, the counsellor acts as a coach to help each partner to journey deeper within their own experience. From that point, the counsellor helps partners communicate with one another in new and transformative ways. Partners are then able to see the potential for new experiences that reflect their yearning for a healthy and secure relationship. When partners begin to actually experience one another in new ways in counselling sessions, the potential for a renewed and reinvigorated relationship begins to be not just a dream but an emerging reality.
When working from an EFT orientation, the desire to be in a relationship with healthy dependence on one another is not considered a problem or a weakness but rather a normal human desire. EFT therapy includes ways of dealing with injuries that have occurred within the relationships, such as affairs. Taking responsibility for one's actions is always important. It has been my experience that partners are more than willing to do so, provided that they feel heard and understood in the process.
Emotionally Focused Therapy has been the subject of intense research and scientific analysis. The recovery rate for couples in EFT therapy has been demonstrated to be in excess of 70%. Couples who have received EFT treatment tend to have low rates of relapse following therapy. EFT has been shown to be effective with same-sex couples, who can expect the same high standard of care in my practice as any other couple.
For a little more information on Emotionally Focused Therapy, view the video here.
I urge you to look at your options carefully when choosing a counsellor to help you with your couples relationship or marriage. Most counselling training focuses on individual counselling. Be sure to ask counsellors you speak to about their training and supervised experience in couples counselling. Ask them about the theoretical model they work from and look into that model to see if it is a good fit for you.
I am a Certified Emotionally Focused therapist - the only such therapist in the Peterborough area.
There is a lot at stake when you seek help in your relationship with your partner. You want to ensure that your counsellor can provide you with both the compassionate care and professional interventions that give you the best chance for a successful outcome.
Would you like to get started on this important work? Click here if you are interested in inquiring further.
Photo by Daniel J. Schwarz on Unsplash
Individual Therapy
As someone who specializes in relationship and family issues, I have worked successfully with many individuals.
The Emotionally Focused Therapy that I do with couples also has a wide application to individual issues.
Sometimes people come to me on their own to improve their relationship when their partner is unable or unwilling to attend counselling with them. Sometimes an individual wants to make sense of their experience in a relationship that has ended in order to improve their chance of success and happiness in future relationships.
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for individuals also helps to resolve the stress that comes from internal conflicts. It is quite common for individuals to have distinct parts within themselves that approach issues and life experiences differently. In the vast majority of cases, this is not at all about mental illness - it is simply about the fact that our minds and the experiences that shape our minds are complex enough that often some work is needed to fine tune different parts into a smoothly working whole.
EFT will help you understand the different parts of your experience and where they come from. An Emotionally Focused Therapist will act as your guide to get these seemingly different parts of yourself into dialogue so that you can mindfully integrate the different parts into a coherent whole that operates with much less inner conflict.
An individual who is well integrated themselves will find it much easier to be in effective relationships with others.
Would you like to get started on this important work? Click here if you are interested in inquiring further.
Photo by Leilani Angel on Unsplash